Breakups: 5 Ways to Heal and Move On
I think we could all agree that heartbreak isn’t easy. Whether it is from a romance or friendship, ending a relationship with someone almost always hurts and can be hard to move on from. I am currently experiencing my first true heartbreak after a long-term relationship and at the beginning, I was struggling to get by and didn’t know how I would be able to move on from this. Though it hasn’t been easy and I am nowhere near healed and ready to move on - I was lucky enough to receive some amazing advice from those around me and since then I have decided I wanted to share this advice with everyone and for anyone who needs to hear it right now.
1. Take a break from social media
I can promise you, social media during this time is only going to do more damage than good at a time like this. You may want to try and see what your ex is up to and what they’re posting or who they are with but I promise you it is better if you don’t know. Having access to information like that can result in unhealthy behaviors and actions that can often leave you feeling upset and alone. If you feel as though social media is a safe space for you or maybe they don’t have a social media account then by all means feel free to use your apps but in the other case - be weary and try and take a break if you can.
2. Practice “no contact”
This is easier said than done but don’t reach back out - especially if they are the one that left! It’s okay to be upset and it’s okay to want to talk to them but in the end it won’t do anyone good. There is a reason the relationship ended in the first place and no matter what, you both have some things you need to work and think about separately. When you want to tell them something, tell one of your best friends or a parent whether it’s good or bad, your ex isn’t the only one that will ever be there for you. Your friends are there to help you - lean on them and don’t feel guilty asking them for help.
3. Keep yourself busy
Speaking of friends, now is the time to make plans with your friends you haven’t seen in awhile. During a breakup, it’s easy to feel super alone so try and keep yourself out of the house and busy when you can. Meeting up with friends and going on trips will keep your mind off things and will constantly surround you with good energy. If you do get upset while you’re out, you have people you love to be there for you and help you through it. Don’t shut yourself out during this time, it will only hurt you more.
4. Write down how you’re feeling
It may not be the easiest thing in the world to talk about what happened and a relationship being over but the best part is, you don’t also have to verbalize it. Writing your feelings down in a journal or notebook is a great way to get your thoughts out and in turn help you rethink and rationalize how you feel. I recently started journaling, not every night but several nights throughout the week to help center myself and my thoughts and sort of keep track of my progress in a way. One day, this all won’t hurt so bad and you may want to look back on this point in your healing journey.
5. Find something you can do just for you
Lastly, find something that you are passionate about and that makes you truly happy and pursue it. You spent so much time focusing on another person - now it’s time to focus on yourself. Pick up a new or existing hobby and put as much time and effort into it as you possibly can. You will not only be distracting yourself but you’ll be pursuing your passions in life which will only bring you to where you are meant to be.
Overall, I know heartbreak and healing is not easy, it’s extremely difficult, sad, and lonely, but it gets better. Healing is not linear and it is okay to have your good and bad days but for those bad days, these tips have truly helped me ground myself and look inward at my feelings and emotions. I don’t wish heartbreak on anybody but if you are going through something similar right now - I hope you’re okay.